Unequally Yoked

The other day, a friend posed the question: “Is it reasonable or even realistic to require things of a potential mate that you don't possess yourself?” Often times people, mainly women, have a laundry list of requirements that they want their future mate to possess. The irony is that some of the prerequisites are things that they themselves haven't attained yet. For example, there are many women who want a man who has a successful career, financial stability, and good credit. They also wouldn't mind if he was easy on the eyes, a perfect gentleman and knew exactly how to make them feel like a woman. Some of these same women are unemployed, have no form of higher education and their credit isn't something that they'd feel comfortable broadcasting. My friend who posed the initial question would say that these women don't deserve and aren't entitled to the type of man that they desire. His rationale is that if you're driving a Honda civic you can't really demand that your future mate drive a Benz. If you have $100 dollars in the bank you shouldn't feel like a man has to have at least $20,000 in his savings account to court you. If you're credit score is a 530, you can't require that potential suitors have at least a 720. I completely understand his perspective and I agree with some of his points. I also don't think there's anything wrong with wanting someone who is a bit more established than you in certain aspects. If your credit is poor and you end up dating someone with good credit, perhaps they can teach you how to boost your score. If you're enrolled in college and you begin dating someone who already has a degree, they could be that motivating factor that drives you to complete your program of study. If you don't have much money in the bank due to poor spending habits and your mate has a nice nest egg due to the exact opposite, they can assist you in disciplining yourself when it comes to saving and spending. In my friend's defense, I do feel like there are stipulations to this. I don't believe that it is wise to enter into a relationship where you and your mate are unequally yoked. If you're working at Zaxby's, chances are you're not going to attract a man whose livelihood is commercial real estate. It is unlikely that someone with a middle school education will engage a college educated person in a relationship. There should definitely be some type of balance in the relationship to ensure that there is growth, reciprocity and mental and spiritual stimulation. I feel like in a relationship, you both should be on the same level in some areas, not all. Dating someone who has exactly the same accomplishments and accolades as you will aide in the growth of your union as a whole, but it's not a necessity. You may just be what that other person needs to provide what their lacking or to at least help them attain it. Your mate is supposed to compliment you not complete you. After all, solid relationships are created and thrive when two complete people come together as one.